Days when it is hard to like your children - yeah, we all have those days!

 

Hello everyone,

I hope that when you read this post, you are keeping safe and healthy!

Here is a scenario:

It's morning. Kids have started to wake up. You go into their rooms and they are laughing and playing. You change them and bring them downstairs. You start getting things ready for breakfast. Then, someone wants the same toy and a small fight erupts. You quickly solve it by presenting another toy - calm achieved. Then, as you place the high chairs - who by the way are IDENTICAL because you want to avoid a fight - for some reason, although they are the same, they want to sit in the SAME chair. When that struggle is over and done with...you get to the actual feeding part.

Although they love yogurt, that morning - no, no yogurt. You give them salami - which they devour all the time - not today...and then, after having tried everything...they say "Elmo" - that is what they call their granola bars because they have Sesame Street characters on them... pfff - you give in because it's not even 9:00am and you are already exhausted...

Then, the fun part of cleaning them up takes place and that is when the REAL fun begins. There is water all over the place, they get away from you with no diapers and you have to run after them - praying they have not peed anywhere in the house.... and it's not even 9:30am...

By the time 10:00am hits, you are DONE, EXHAUSTED - and then, you realize you need to take out for a walk...oh goodness, this will be fun...

I think you get it!

On days like that, it gets very hard to like them - of course, you love them to death, but liking them...yikes!!! And the good thing is that, all of a sudden, they do something so freaking adorable and then, you just fall in love and you have forgotten everything that took place earlier. 

Let's be real, we all have those days. They are not easy and they clearly drive us all crazy - but we go through them because hey - they are kids. And when we were kids, we drove our parents crazy too - my mom says I still drive her crazy 😒

What do I do on those days? I remember to breathe and I just got with it - fighting it is pointless and only fuels more screaming... I try to prevent most of it, but when I can't, I remember that they are young and are still unable to process all the emotions they are going through. And, yes - I will use some screen time to ease off some of then tension. I have also started to take them out on drives - they actually enjoy them. I let them bring some toys with them and they just watch the scenery and babble and laugh and enjoy the ride. 

I used to get so angry and scream - but that would only do two things: 1) make them scream more and 2) I felt so guilty for having screamed at them. It now takes a lot for me to scream - and I mean, a lot. I try to not use the work "no", but that is so hard - but I am working on it. I do encourage and applaud their good behavior and that helps. Another trick up my sleeve is to bring out toys they have not seen in a while - it is new to them and it entertains them! I am also learning their triggers - very often, it's because they want more attention or just...want to eat something.

Breathing - praying - new toys - car rides - snacks and Netflix - if done in moderation, can lead to a more smooth day. And there will be times when after you have done ALL those things - it will still be a hard day. When that happens - just brace for it! Time outs and removal of toys are good ways of getting their attention. It will lead to tears but they need to learn that just because they are small, it does not allow them to be little tyrants... discipline is key during those days!

All in all, most days are fine because, eventually, you enter into a routine with them. YES - routine and discipline are KEY!! What matters the most is how you act during those times when these tiny human beings are unable to speak and express their emotions. Remember - if you can have bad days, so can they! In the end, your kids just want love and safety. So, breathe in and out and face whatever challenge they throw at you - sometimes, literally....

How do you deal with those moments when you find it difficult to like your children? Any tips and tricks? Please share and let's build our community!

Until my next post, take care and enjoy this long weekend - OH!! It is a stay-cation for our family next week, so no posts next week!

Remember to keep safe, wear your face masks, wash your hands, not touch your face and practice social distancing. Do your part to stop the spread of Covid-19.

SM