My family member does not accept my adopted child - ugh!
Hello everyone,
Hope that wherever you are, it is nice and sunny - here it is!
So, you have been trying to be a parent all this time and then you adopt and you are STUNNED that a family member is not accepting of your child. I am not talking about a distant cousin, but someone as close as a mother, mother in-law, sibling ... so, someone that you never thought would be acting in such a way.
What do you do?
First, you feel your emotions. You need to be honest with yourself and allow yourself to feel anger, bitter, confused and sad.
Second, you need to address the situation hands-on and in person, if possible. If you live in different cities or countries, then, use SKYPE, Viber, Messenger ...whatever you can to be able to see the person's face. This is and will be a very difficult conversation and doing in face to face will be more powerful.
Third, you need to remember that you are your child's advocate. Although you cannot protect from everything - even if I think I can - you cannot let a close family member act in such a way that they will hurt your child. Your child will suffer enough from the world and their family should be the safest place for them.
Fourth and most difficult thing to do - if the family member is unable to accept your child, you will need to face the hard reality that this family member may no longer be a part of your life and your child's life. Don't be fooled and think that this is not done, because it is. It is painful, but your child's welfare always comes first!
If you or someone you know has been in this situation, please share - let's support each other!
SM
Hope that wherever you are, it is nice and sunny - here it is!
So, you have been trying to be a parent all this time and then you adopt and you are STUNNED that a family member is not accepting of your child. I am not talking about a distant cousin, but someone as close as a mother, mother in-law, sibling ... so, someone that you never thought would be acting in such a way.
What do you do?
First, you feel your emotions. You need to be honest with yourself and allow yourself to feel anger, bitter, confused and sad.
Second, you need to address the situation hands-on and in person, if possible. If you live in different cities or countries, then, use SKYPE, Viber, Messenger ...whatever you can to be able to see the person's face. This is and will be a very difficult conversation and doing in face to face will be more powerful.
Third, you need to remember that you are your child's advocate. Although you cannot protect from everything - even if I think I can - you cannot let a close family member act in such a way that they will hurt your child. Your child will suffer enough from the world and their family should be the safest place for them.
Fourth and most difficult thing to do - if the family member is unable to accept your child, you will need to face the hard reality that this family member may no longer be a part of your life and your child's life. Don't be fooled and think that this is not done, because it is. It is painful, but your child's welfare always comes first!
If you or someone you know has been in this situation, please share - let's support each other!
SM
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